I often get asked "can you control impulsive reactions" or "How to stop reacting impulsively" so in this article, I want to tell you that yes, it is possible to not only control them, but stop them. I'll be giving you tips to stop reacting and start responding - grab your favorite drink and keep reading :)
What is an impulsive reaction?
Impulsive reactions happen when you get triggered, that is to say when an external situation activates an automatic response within you, in your subconscious mind.
You feel threatened or hurt but you're not consciously aware of what is causing that. It's like an activation that takes place deep within and creates an emotional reaction, an impulsive behavior.
Behind every impulsive reaction is a wound to heal, an imbalance to rebalance and this doesn't have to take ages!
Being triggered is NOT fun, it's uncomfortable, it's painful - but you can stop impulsive reactions!
The impulsive reactions you can happen to have can make you feel even worse because you tend to blame yourself or feel ashamed of your impulsive behavior, which amplifies the initial wound that was causing the trigger in the first place.
Let me tell you something: we all get triggered, we all have impulsive reactions, it's part of the human nature. So, please know there is no need for your to blame or shame yourself.
You're human and the simple fact that you're reading this article means that you are already working on yourself - pat yourself on the back for being there for yourself! :)
What you need to know about triggers & impulsive reactions
I created a podcast episode to help you raise your awareness on your own reactions - always with self-love, benevolence and non-judgment! Because that's what I'm all about here in this safe space :)
4 tips to stop reacting impulsively reactions & stop being triggered
We all know that unpleasant feeling of being triggered...
You might feel you're losing it, you want to scream or maybe you're feeling super emotional and you wish you could turn into a little mouse and run away to hide somewhere... (that used to be me...)
As if it wasn't enough to feel that way, you shame yourself for your impulsive reaction, you wish you could handle things in a better way, you're hard on yourself.
Basically, it makes it hard to function in society sometimes, you get overwhelmed and feel like you need to dissociate to cope.
Let me say it again, it's ok to struggle controlling your impulsive behavior - you are working on self-improvement, you don't have to judge yourself, you just need to know that you can change that pattern from a place of self-love
You already have what it takes within you to do this!
You can start now with these 4 easily actionable tips:
journal about a type of situation that usually triggers you (ex: think of the last time you were triggered, what happened? how did you feel? how did your body react? what took place within you emotionally and mentally?)
Reflect upon the 1st time in your life when you felt this way: close your eyes and just breathe, information will come up and you'll see what wound hides behind this
What did you need at that moment? And what do you need right now? How can you be there for yourself? (ex: you might want to hear that you're safe, you're loved, all will be ok, that it wasn't your fault...) how can you be there for yourself
remember that other people's words or actions have nothing to do with you: --> if someone wants to hurt you, it's their issue, you're not responsible for that, --> if someone says something without any intention to hurt you but you feel hurt, then it means there's a wound that needs to be looked into and healed... and it's ok, it only means you're human - take these 3 previous steps and start again :)
Want to know my (not-so) secret formula for guaranteed self-improvement, expansion, empowerment and self-confidence building?
Instead of "why is this happening again?", ask yourself "what is this teaching me?"
I used to react, now most of the time I respond. It starts with changing habits
If you catch yourself reacting or about to react, here is what you can do:
thank yourself for noticing and having your own back
do the inner work to heal whatever needs attention.
5 steps to heal impulsive reactions by yourself
In this podcast episode, you will hear complementary information to go deeper so that you stay mindful of your reactions and respond to life instead of reacting.
Giving your power away to situations ends here ! :)
As a leader, you have all it takes to become so balanced and at peace with yourself that no matter what others might say, no matter what situations you are in, you won't get triggered.
Even if you'd get slightly triggered, you'd know how to get yourself back into balance very quickly :)
Imagine a life in which you'd be able to silence your mind, overcome self-doubt and step into the self-confident and heart-led version of yourself who trusts herself/himself to make decisions that move your life and your business forward (without second-guessing yourself). I promise you it's possible :)
You were born to create impact and you can increase this impact to the next level by expanding from within!
If you'd like to have a more personal conversation about this, I am inviting you to book your free clarity call and I will help you implement changes in your life.
I'm looking forward to connecting with you!
Related article: 3 things I wish I knew about impulsive reactions